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Los Angeles Life Coach Laura Asks: Do New Year’s Resolutions Work?

A Life Coach or Career Coach Can Make the Difference

You know the drill.  It’s the new year and you have a new resolve to lose the weight,  start exercising, quit smoking, begin meditating, etc.  Or maybe this year you’re resolved to finish the book you’ve been dabbling with, or get that promotion that’s overdue, or navigate a transition to a new, more meaningful career – one that makes you want to get out of bed in the morning.

You start off strong. This is the year you’re going to do it. After six weeks or so, you’ve built up some momentum and confidence. You’ve started to make some progress and you’re feeling good. And then March rolls around. Distractions surface. Stuff happens to usurp your time and money. It’s tax time after all.  Or maybe fear and doubt creep in. Old patterns of thinking sabotage your progress. You tell yourself this is temporary and when the weather gets warmer, you’ll re-double your efforts and start anew.

Now it’s summer and you’re back on it. The sun is out, the weather is warm and you’re feeling optimistic. You’re going to stick to it this time. You start to regain the momentum from earlier in the year. Then as the weather turns colder, stuff happens again. More distractions. Life gets increasingly hectic as the holidays approach. And when the holidays hit, you tell yourself:  “Just get through the holidays.”

You decide to table everything until the new year…and then the cycle begins again.

If all of this sounds familiar, then hiring a life coach, career coach or spiritual coach might be the way to go this year. One of the reasons why coaching works is that it’s a support structure that holds you accountable for your progress. Life coaching and career coaching (as well as other types of coaching such as spiritual, business, relationship, etc.) keeps you focused when will power waxes and wanes and distractions deter your progress. And on a deeper level, coaching works because it helps you to dissolve the soundtracks from the past which sabotage your future.  Since I began coaching in 2005, I have found that fear and doubt are the two biggest reasons why people don’t achieve their goals. Distractions are the third.

But life coaching or career coaching is not meant to be a permanent support structure.  A good life coach or career coach strives to coach you to independence – not dependence. So a skillfully trained coach works with you to create other, long-term support structures to help you not only attain your goals but sustain them, long after the coaching is over.

Resolve this year to make your resolutions work. Give yourself the support to attain and sustain your progress throughout the year so you can make 2011 the time in which you achieve the personal and professional success that has eluded you in the past.

Posted by Laura Svolos, Certified Professional Coach and Swami of Kriya Yoga specializing in life, career, relationship and spiritual/wellness coaching.

Take the first step in making your resolutions work, schedule a free consult with Coach Laura.

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Whether you are looking for a mate or you are in a relationship that may need some refinement to thrive, spending quality time focused solely on you, and taking a holistic approach to your life makes all the difference!

For those seeking to find that special someone, or to enhance a current, committed relationship, it is so important to enhance communication, understanding and intimacy. However, if you are stuck in anger, resentment, past hurts and the like, this may not be such an easy task.

You may have noticed that you always attract the same type of person. They seem a “perfect match” at first but then the same old patterns plague your relationship and you end up feeling disillusioned, disappointed and needing to leave for the presumed “greener pastures.”

What is a “holistic approach”? It is life coaching in which we are not just focused on one aspect of you, but on all of you (mind, body, emotions, spirit and practical life management). There are fantastic mind-body tools to really make a difference in eliminating internal challenges that may be keeping you stuck in repetitive negative patterns.

Some of these tools include neuro-linguistic programming and the emotional freedom technique, Silva Mind Control, guided visualization, and self-hypnosis. Together with focused life coaching and self-compassion, you more quickly free yourself of past resentments, and the emotional baggage which often plagues many relationships.

Many people are searching for that perfect match and they believe that once they find him or her, all of a sudden life will be all better (i.e., happily ever after).

Most people inherently realize this isn’t possible and that “happily ever after” is from fairy tales. But it seems that wishful thinking and hoping it is true never really leaves any of us.

The truth is that finding and keeping successful relationships is much more about BE-ing the “right” person yourself. From that state of being your best you, you become far more attractive to those people you would most want in your life. You will find you are attracting a different type of person – one who is better able to appreciate who you are because you are better appreciating yourself!

Concentrate on developing the inner you – your BE-ingness. When you flourish on the inside, with or without a mate you become much more attractive. In a way you are creating a magnetic energetic field of attraction of those people and opportunities you want to bring into your life. When your focus is turned inward to improving who you are, those whom you want to attract will find their way to you much more easily and readily.

The first goal in life coaching is to create a life you love – to live your life’s purpose, values, and to find real meaning, confidence and joy. If you are to be a good partner to your mate or to attract a partner then taking an inward focus and spending time really getting to know, love and appreciate yourself – to release the past, forgive yourself and others and to truly “come home” to yourself.

A gardener weeds and fertilizes nurtures and tends to his or her garden with love, patience and caring. Even the loveliest of gardens have weeds popping up and require maintenance. A good and intuitive gardener pays close attention – notices changes and potential problems and is pro-active in prevention.

Gardening is an ongoing process, not a one-time event. A relationship – a good relationship with you – requires the same kind of ongoing “gardening”.

In many instances communication, or miscommunication and unrealistic expectations are 90% of the problem in relationships. Much of this miscommunication and these unrealistic expectations come from depending on your partner to fill all your needs and to make you happy. This puts an overwhelming strain (albeit unexpressed, but felt anyway) on your partner and the relationship.

In life coaching you will really “come home” to yourself. You will learn what really makes your life flow and fulfill your own personal needs so that when you do meet a special someone, or if you are in a committed relationship, you are a far better partner. You stop expecting the unreasonable. You begin taking responsibility for your own happiness and in co-creating joy with your partner, or potential life mate.

Some people consider life coaching a luxury. Truly life coaching is an incredible gift you can give yourself such that you create a life you love – a happier, more fulfilled you! After all, the best relationship is the one you have with yourself. If that isn’t good it is awfully difficult for a relationship with a partner to remain and thrive.

Read what some of my clients have to say about life coach Dr. Christina Winsey, Life and Relationship Coach

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It’s never too late to learn new tricks as this video reveals.

Yes, anyone can learn a new technique or trick for success.  Surf the Internet and it’s full of proven methods to become successful in business, your career, and your life.  Every day, a new guaranteed program is popping up in the field of self-help.  Many of my clients turn to coaching because they have repeatedly tried everything from A to Z and it works for a little while, then it’s back to their old ways.

What’s missing?  Why do old patterns keep showing up over and over?  Research demonstrates that it takes 28-30 days to change a habit, introduce a new way of conducting business, living life, etc.  Actually, what I’ve discovered is that it only takes 14 days because if you have repeated a new habit or technique consistently for 14 days, by the 15th day, it will seem strange without it.  So, you usually continue.  By the time you reach the end of the 30 days, you have successfully shifted.  Then all it takes is another couple months to reinforce it, and voila, you’ve sustained a change.

In theory, this sounds too easy.  You’re right.  There is one more piece to making this work.  It has to be in synch with who you are naturally.  Most of my clients have no idea who they really are and what makes them tick.  They have been too busy listening to everyone else and not truly taking time to find out.

Is this complicated?  No.  The first place to start is to ask 2 questions.  What energizes you and what drains you?  You always know what drains you and if you start to pay attention, you can easily identify what energizes you, as well.

The key is to start creating a custom navigation tool that will help you get back on course and stay on the road to success.  Only by doing the things that come naturally will you be able to stop resisting yourself and actually improve the quality of your life.

I am not recommending that you make any drastic changes.  I am only asking you to discover 2 things:
1. What energizes you?

2. What drains you?

Once you are clear with both questions, you can start coming up with a list of things that must happen in your life.  These will start to be included in your top priorities.  For example, one of my clients, a business owner, was trying to grow his business and heard from many sources that all he had to do was to attend business functions, network and follow-up on leads.  This appeared to be sound advice.  However, group socializing and general networking meetings actually totally drained him.  He did better with growing individual relationships that were meaningful.  So, he created a description of his ideal client and researched places they would attend.  Turns out, he was targeting individuals in the creative professions and he had a passion for the performing arts.  Instead of attending unfruitful business meetings, he attended plays and started becoming involved in Community Theater in his back yard.  His new approach energized him and satisfied his passion for the arts.  In just a couple of months, he was happier and had acquired a dozen new clients.  He was no longer resisting the traditional marketing program.  This client changed the physical location where he was conducting business.  Physical locations provide some of the most powerful cues to behavior.

The most important thing to remember about success is to give yourself permission to explore alternatives without being fixed on the outcome.  To change a pattern or habit that’s not working, identify where this usually happens.  Then …change the context, change the cues.   …This requires understanding the triggers to your own behavior.

In the business world, it’s all about ROI and value propositions from employees.  Performance reviews are all about metrics.  It’s not about abolishing the metrics; it’s about giving yourself permission to creatively look at new approaches that map to the way you operate best.  If you increase the activities that energize you and minimize the ones that drain you, you will already notice a difference.

Try a free coaching consultation with Wanda Ropa, your success coach to get you started and get clear about where you’re going with your career, or with your life so you can develop a strategic plan that really works for you.  With clarity, success becomes a natural outcome.
Posted by Wanda Ropa, The Success Coach.

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As a Parenting Coach and Parent, Stepping Back and Looking at the Forest While Implementing Your Action Plan is Key

Parenting is the hardest job in the world.  Keeping an objective focus, bouncing ideas off of an objective third party, and keeping it all in perspective is key to sanity – and good parenting.  Having a parenting coach sounds goofy to some – it did to me.  But, really being able to keep perspective and to help talk through ideas to improve your skills in one of (if not the) most important job in your life – doesn’t sound so silly when the job and the joy of parenting is put in perspective.

Let me put my money where my mouth is, and share a very personal story that led me to believe that investing in a parenting coach will result in more confidence, better parenting (which in part is from confidence), more well-rounded kids, and perspective.  Here is my story:

When we got the news, we were sitting at a gas station – somewhere in West Virginia.  We were on the way to Williamsburg – a week vacation that we had planned for a long time.  It was hot and humid, and we had been driving for only a couple of hours on our second day of travel.  The kids were all awake, had been well behaved, and they were all laughing.  Henry, of course, had the loudest and deepest chortle – with a smile from ear to ear.  His laughter and happiness are infectious, and really have been a medicine for all of us. 

As I climbed back in the van, having gassed up, with the kids laughter in the background, Kristen was on the phone.  The conversation was serious, but Kristen, as she always does, brought comfort to the caller – she was gracious and kind – knowing at some level how difficult it was for Shirley to deliver the news that afternoon.  I quieted the kids down, and soon wish that I hadn’t.  Quieting the laughter, in retrospect, was so wrong. 

I knew Shirley; she was Henry’s neurologist’s assistant – she was to call about his biopsy results.  Before Kristen got off the phone, I knew the news.  I am no sleuth.  Kristen talked about the team that would be assembled, she talked about scheduling, and was being given websites to browse.  His biopsy confirmed the feared diagnosis.  Henry has a mitochondrial disease.  When Kristen pressed, Shirley specified that he had a form of the Complex 1 mitochondrial disease. 

To receive the news at a gas station somewhere in West Virginia was ironic and definitely consistent with our journey.  For years, we had been in search.  In search for answers, a diagnosis, a treatment, a reason.  And, we had seen dozens of doctors, in many hospitals, in three states all across the country.  We moved, in part, to be close to the program where Henry could get the treatment.  And in that program, they tell us that he has a much bigger problem. Our poor little Henry sent off again to more (and different) doctors for more tests, more procedures, more unknowns.  So, after all of this, we sit at a gas station in West Virginia to be given the diagnosis.  Right now, it is an answer (though not the one we wanted), that creates so many more questions.  The journey continues.

When Kristen got off the phone, we did not lose our cool.  I said “he has it.”  Kristen nodded, and we started a movie for the kids.  In our own bubble in the front of the car, with Scooby Doo muting our conversation, Kristen told me her conversation.  The most I remember from those several minutes were my impression that Shirley was kind in her delivery.  The type of kindness that we never wanted to have to face.  And hadn’t before.  She told Kristen that Henry would be a candidate for the Mitochondrial Clinic, and that we would have an appointment with the neurologist, geneticist, and a genetics counselor.  She also said not to despair – that everyone responds differently and that there could be development in the field.

Those later comments took me back to Dr. DeGraw (Henry’s neurologist) comment to me when I pressed him about prognosis – if Henry had a mitochondrial disease.  He told me not to research it, not to cross the bridge before we get there, that medicine is miraculous, but “to answer your question, the prognosis is not good.  There is no cure, and there are no survivors so far.”

The kids engrossed with Scooby, Kristen and I used the gas station parking lot as our internet library.  Both of us on our Blackberries, we went to the site that Shirley directed us to.  Like with many things, Kristen was faster than I.  At first, when she said “Complex 1,” I thought she said it is a “complex one” meaning difficult.  So, I am slow.  She grabbed my hand and said, it is neuro-degenerative and progressive.  Could result in hearing and vision loss – before the mulit-system failure.  The one we didn’t want to have – of course.  Essentially, Henry’s cells do not have the energy necessary to have his organs do what they need to do.  It is system wide, and with age, the energy drops more and more, affecting new systems in different ways, in no particular order.  The disease progresses until there is not enough energy for life function.  So, he will pass with this – unless our prayers are answered (and medicine comes a long way fast).  The fact that several of his systems have already been affected (called early onset) is not a great sign – just from a pure time standpoint.  The literature points out the obvious – the later the onset and the slower the progression, the longer the life expectancy.  But, it is all very individualized.  So, we are not defeated. 

After our internet café parking lot picked up with traffic, we got back on the road.  As tears streamed down her face, I could show no emotion.  My stomach was in knots, and I’m sure that my next questions seemed like what a medical student would ask a mentor – not a father of a sick son.  I asked, “Will he degenerate cognitively?” (as I can’t imagine our smart little boy in that state).  Then, I asked “What about Luke?”  Kristen knew the questions were almost rhetorical, and we just exchanged painful glances.

On the trip, for the first time, we both noticed (though we didn’t discuss for the week) that Henry was quite drained.  He refused to walk, saying he couldn’t for a few days.  The trooper was tired.  Many days, he was too tired to laugh.  Henry, too tired to laugh, was very painful for us.  It could be emphasized because we knew, but it was what it was. 

Our next discussions turned to what we have always come back to – making sure that our family is whole, happy, and complete.  The goal has never changed from the start.  We love our family so much, and are so lucky to have each other.  We are focused on giving all of our kids the most full (but “normal” – whatever that means) life that we can.  The kids are all very happy, and we plan to keep it that way.  There is a bit of an ominous burden in the back of our minds – that we want to make sure we know what full is (we think it is love), and the journey ahead and the time we have is uncertain.  As is whether Luke will also fall victim to the disease, or his recent symptoms (gastrointestinal, eye issues – and his hypothyroidism) are just coincidental.  So, we will take it one step at a time, get Henry his treatments (whatever they may be – there are some experimental ones out there), and cherish every day.

Of course, our story is not unlike many others.  Everyone has a challenge – some more difficult than others.  But, keeping perspective and the eye on the ball – providing the opportunity for a full and happy life (whatever its length) to our children is the lesson here.  I know that as well as anyone.

And the bottom line, our story is just the beginning. What we needed, got and continue to get, were specific ideas and ways to achieve these goals.  Not just the “be happy” goal.  We captured our ideas in starting a non-profit for kids like Henry – Henry’s Hope, Inc. – www.henryshope.org.  That was a specific and effective strategy – that, we as a family, work on.

Good parenting coaches provide specific ideas to try out (we don’t have the answers as there aren’t right and wrong in parenting) – but you deserve someone that has experienced a lot, fouled up, got help, and can provide kind, useful, and helpful insight into the issues we all face as parents.  Choosing to get the help – whether through a parenting coach or other means – is a brave and humbling act as a parent.  Call today for a free consult.

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Introducing

the SOS Group: 

Answering Your

SOS Call

To

Shift Onto Solution Mode

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

at 6 pm (Pacific)****

Free Group Tele-Coaching Session with Coach Wanda

Has your rescue ship already set sail? 

Are you looking for relief to sail out of problem mode? 

To land in safe harbor and leave your problems behind? 

Are you constantly in distress? 

Sending out an SOS, with no answer? 

Are you out of flow? 

And your problems just grow?

Are you experiencing a recurrent theme of starting, then stopping, and then starting, only to stop in your tracks once again.  Are you frustrated and feel that you will never make any changes?  Do your problems just multiply like bunnies?

Your rescue plane is about to land….. this free group tele-coaching session is a gift!

In less than one hour you will receive one easy and effortless action step to start managing your problems before they manage you. 

You are not alone.  Come experience the energy and dynamic of how the group can support you to shift into solution mode.

Come re-charge your battery and start creating your own solutions!

Click here to sign up, limited spaces available. 

Save the date: 

Tuesday, June 12, 2007 at 6 pm (Pacific)****

Free Group Tele-Coaching Session with Coach Wanda

Feel free to share this opportunity with a friend!

Ready to have your SOS answered?

Upon registration, you will receive your bridge-line phone number to call along with easy instructions to participate in this free group tele-coaching session.

Wanda is an excellent Success coach and Creativity Architect. She is definitely one of the best Coaches to turn to when you are stuck with a problem, challenge or obstacle in business or in life and can help you move through the “stuckness” to taking action with tools that are easy, effortless and fun!
-Sharon Price
Founder & Marketing Executive
PowerMarketing University
San Diego, CA 

Wanda has a unique gift when it comes to working with people. Wanda TRULY wants to help people succeed. She has the unique capability to focus on the needs of the person with whom she is speaking. She is a great listener and totally engages in the needs of the person. She is intelligent, witty, flexible, hard working, caring, intense, and fun. People flock to her; she has a “pied-pier” ability to draw people to her, and handles this gift with respect.
-M.G.
Chief Human Resources Officer
Ames, IA

Wanda was an inspiring coach who used creative tools and helped me to add amazing techniques to my own toolbox. I have benefited greatly from the guidance, information and creative problem solving that have to be the foundation of this process. I would highly recommend the process to anyone who is searching for their next steps in life or in their career.
-Robin F.
Training Leader
Kansas City, MO

The Quicksand of Your Mind

Are you in struggle?
Your mind a puddle?
Are you stuck?
What luck?
In the quicksand of your mind?

Are you out of flow
And problems just grow?
What to do, to solve this riddle?
Stuck in the middle
In the quicksand of your mind.

There’s only one way
Out of this unwanted stay.
Resolve to clearly see
And not live by some false decree
In the quicksand of your mind.

Wanda Ropa 

Copyright ©2007 Wanda Ropa

Reserve your spot today!

6 pm (Pacific)****

7 pm (Mountain daylight savings)

8 pm (Central)

9 pm (Eastern)         

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Introducing Feroce Coaches
Bradley Foster and Wanda Ropa

Attend our Free Group Coaching Session

Learn how to achieve creative breakthroughs everyday!

Hear Bradley Foster and Wanda Ropa in action in this free group coaching session where you can get some work done and listen to others bring their challenges forward. This is an interactive coaching session where you are invited to participate.  You will experience the creative synergy of these dynamic and exciting coaches as they coach a group live.Â

Bradley and Wanda are experienced leaders with a fresh approach whether your challenge is at work, at home, in your career, your relationships or achieving your goals.

Join Bradley and Wanda to help you get you back to that space where you are able to breathe and to see that you have many more options than you thought possible.

Stop Dreaming and Live your dreams!

Sign up, now, spaces will fill up quickly.*

Choose the date that is best for you:

Tuesday, June 12, 2007 at 11 am (Pacific)****

Click here to sign up.

Feel free to share this opportunity with a friend!

Upon registration, you will receive your bridge-line phone number to call along with easy instructions to participate.

Ready to join us?

**** 12:00 pm Day light Mountain Savings; 1:00 pm Central; 2:00 pm Eastern

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