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Of course, we can say "I will quit overspending, start
exercising, etc..." all the
livelong day and it does not lead to change. Why? Because the words themselves cannot serve as that DARN
intention. Once you have resolved within yourself to
change, whether by yourself or with life change
coaching, once you have determined you want the change, it
becomes possible and real. When you have convinced
yourself there are good reasons to do this and that it
is important to you, that is when you ripen toward
action.
Your ambivalence is the sticking point in tipping this
balance. Part of you clearly,
perhaps desperately, wants to move ahead, yes- and part
of you is firmly wobbling on the fence!
One way to call upon your good sense in this dilemma is
to make a pros/cons list.
In the hard lines of black-on-white print we can startle
ourselves into seeing the clear, crisp edges of a
decision. Ask yourself:
"What would happen if I made this change?"
"What would I have to do if I ____?"
"What might I lose if I ____?"
Think about Desire: Why do you want this change? What
exactly is it you wish for?
Be specific, and as detailed as possible.
Consider your Ability to change: How might you
strategize the steps involved?
What inner strengths can you draw upon? What other
resources, outside yourself?
The Reasons for the change can be a crucial persuasive
factor: why should you
do this, anyway?
Why go to the effort and disrupt your routine, possibly
even your sense of who you are? List all the advantages
and drawbacks you can generate.
With incisive honesty, list all the ways in which you
Need to make this change.
Rate it, 1-10 scale. Then ask yourself, "Why am I
at___?" Notice you are not at zero.
What do you make of this?
Perhaps by now you have decided you hate setting goals,
or are just not the kind of person who sets goals at
all...
Did you know there are three factors that are much more
important than IQ when it comes to success? Self-confidence, perseverance, and a willingness to set
goals predict achievement more reliably than
intelligence alone.
The problem a lot of people have with goal-setting is
feeling the discontent involved, the discomfort in
admitting the difference between where we are and where
we want to be. It's unpleasant.
Who doesn't like wishing, though? Doesn't the word
itself even have a bit of magic in it? A "wish" is
suggestive of so much possibility and delight. A "goal"
might sound like drudgery, and certainly involves
effort.
Our deepest and best thinking is done in the powerhouse
of our intellect, where wishes lie, the
not-quite-conscious part of our minds.
What are you wishing for? Taking a few quiet moments and
writing whatever pops into your head about this question
can be the first small step in becoming remarkably
productive, satisfied, and content with your life.
Not sure where to begin? Or where this path will lead?
Coaching can help sort you sort through some of your
goal setting and allow you to create a structure you may
not be able to see for yourself. Even for just one
visit, the opportunity to have the undivided attention
of an experienced guide on this, perhaps, dimly-lit and
little-traveled road could take you to a lovely
destination.
Return to page 1 on
Life Skills Coaching Through Goal-Setting.
Life Change Coaching Articles by
Kate McNulty
Relationship Advice Coaching -- Boundaries and Dating
Relationship Counseling -- Using Conflict to Build
Closer Relationships
Personal Coach for a Woman -- Appreciation of the Body in
Everyday Life
Notes
from a Portland Oregon Career Coach
Leadership Executive Coaching
Business
Entrepreneur Coaching
Presentation
Coaching
Personal Growth
Coach on Getting Rid of Fear of Risk
Life Skills Coach on
Goal-Setting
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