I cannot think of a need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection” Sigmund Freund
This Sunday is Father’s day across America.
It’s no surprise that having fathers around is in the best interests of children’s emotional as well as physical health. Historical studies document that fact. Their primary, not exclusive, responsibility is different than a mother’s.
As a faithful Bible reader, I believe this model for mothers and fathers originates in the third chapter of Genesis in which God tell s Eve in the Garden of Eden: “your desire will be for your husband and he shall rule over you. “
Woman’s desire for a husband is the female inclination to value monogamous heterosexual relationships more than men. It is a reflection of a higher premium women place on human relationships, which is in the best interests of children and family.
During the past thousands of years, women were faced with the challenge of attracting males and encouraging them to maintain a monogamous relationship. That insured greater safety and regular sustenance for the family. Women’s greater skill in nurturing and caring for children required her to focus on that task, and have a male partner providing and protecting her and the children.
Despite the modern women’s movement belief that men and women are psychologically indistinguishable I think that the reality of caring for children and providing for the family has adjusted those roles but not changed them fundamentally. When taking responsibility for a family, just like a business or a sports team, it is important to have defined roles with primary responsibilities.
For a woman to maximize her potential in the role of nurturing parent she is dependent on a supportive male. Without adequate male support the emotional security and physical sustenance are weakened and stresses increase.
For a male to embrace the role of father, and not just provider, takes an investment of time and a lot of learning. Some tips include: spending positive quality time with your children; disciplining with love; being a positive role model; be a teacher; listen before you speak; and make time to eat as a family.
The best father is one with a loving relationship with his wife. And children thrive when mother and father respect and value each other’s importance as parents.